Hello. My name is Abby and I’m a people-pleaser.
If you’ve spent much time with me or others from my tribe
(or you are also a fellow PP), you know that we yearn to tell you something you
want to hear. If there’s a lull in the conversation, I’ll get you talking about
yourself. I’ve done it for so long now, I give off a scent that alerts strangers
to share very personal information with me. I’m the Barbara Walters of
Murfreesboro. I recently went to a store to get a new battery for my watch.
This particular store only sells batteries and light bulbs, a very specific
inventory the salespeople are eager to explain in depth to you. I really needed
to go to the bathroom, so when the clerk finished installing my battery and
asked me if I knew about their new line of light bulbs, I should have told him
I wasn’t interested and hightailed it home. Due to my condition (PP), I begin
asking probing questions about the decline of the incandescent bulb and the
halogen vs. LED debate. I REALLY had to go to the bathroom (pee-pee), but I
allowed him to escort me to the display where I could compare the color and
quality of the different bulbs. I am my own worst enemy.
I also don’t enjoy being the bearer of bad news. So when
friends ask about the progress of our adoption, I’m crestfallen. Obviously, the
majority of my disappointment is because we haven’t brought our two-year old
son home from Africa, in spite of the fact that we’ve been matched to him for
over a year. Another part of my sadness, though, is that I can’t say: “We’re
leaving Thursday!” That would be the ultimate people-pleasing moment. And no
one would be more pleased than my family and me.
The longer I’ve been in this holding pattern, the harder
it’s been to battle the demon so easily accessible to me: Bitterness. Yesterday,
I heard a news story about a Tennessee Congresswoman who’s taking on a new
fight. She got wind of the Government’s plan to create new standards for the
ceiling fan industry and she just won’t stand for it. She recently took on the
new laws about the incandescent bulbs, too. (I know of a certain light bulb
fanatic she might be interested in…) Several months ago I contacted her office
to ask if she could help bring focus to the plight of the many children waiting
unnecessarily to be adopted. They told me we don’t live in her district so she
is unable to help. Now if only I had a ceiling fan complaint, then she would’ve
been all ears!
Cynicism is the fast food version of dealing with your
feelings. I can run pass the drive-thru and get a greasy bag full of anger and
resentment with a side of blaming others. Or I can sit down at the dinner table with
my disappointment and hash it out. I tell myself that life is full of frustration
and for most of the world it’s much, much worst. I say, “Buck up,
Grouchy-Pants. Just keep doing the best you can,” but that will only get you so
far.
I want news. I want GOOD news. I want GOOD news NOW.
So that’s my update for today. We’re still waiting. We hoped
to travel this summer but it doesn’t look likely. Not very pleasing. Sorry.